A Lone A Gain.

From such a high happiness, here i am alone again.  Was i ever together or was it mockery of the myth we call love.  I can see my mistakes, they remain the same.  I am oblivious to the impact of my own, and all too aware of my other.  With a belief that i know what they mean more than they may say to me.  She doesn't want to be forthright in telling me how she feels, therefore i am sent on a wild goose chase until i stand at the fires of Mordor with one conclusion to rule them all.  I suppose winter love melts in the spring, even though i haven't seen the snow embrace the ground. so suddenly am i lost that my body will grow ill.  Oh gods the shame is heavy help me to see my proper memories.  why feel so abandoned?  because its late, because she's not here, because others come first, because objects come first, because drugs, because dreams, because sweet is bitter and spicy is sour, because too much is never enough, because words, because shame in myself is proven by my own actions, because laughter has been swept from the hardwood floors of my soul and i need time to let the dust recollect.